TRITONMAN 2022 BY DORI LARBIG

Disclaimer: All events detailed in this story are subject to bias and my memory loss

Tritonman was finally here, the race that had been hyped up for the whole year. Now, as I am sitting in the UCSB library writing this race recap (specifically on the second floor, at the third table to the right in the Gender Studies section, sitting next to Logan) I can confidently agree that this race was a blast.

The six athletes racing draft legal were expected to meet at the Rec Cen parking lot at 9AM sharp. Knowing that I tend to run late in situations like this, I sprint-biked from my dorm, carrying 2 backpacks, my wetsuit, and a full bag of snacks. I fell over once along the way, denting my hydro flask, and some random dude had to help me up. Despite all of this, I was the first to arrive. And, to my dismay, everyone else were all very late.

We hitched the trailer to our luxurious Ford Expedition, loaded up the bikes and were off to San Diego. Eddie drove with Dillen on aux, Jayson and Daniel were in the middle row, and Paxton and I were partying in the back row.

This drive was relatively eventful. An hour into the ride, I had to take an Econ midterm, which unfortunately could not have been rescheduled. I told everyone to be quiet, and in response Eddie blasted the EDM song “Love Tonight” by David Guetta. Let’s just say I didn’t do as well as I wanted to on that test.

Somewhere along the road after we got through the Superbowl-Weekend LA traffic, the group came to the consensus that we were all in need of a pee break. It turned out that all of us had needed to go for the 3 hours prior but were too scared to say something with Eddie driving. After getting off the freeway and circling around the streets of Carlsbad for way to long, we finally found a spot to park the trailer, and set off to find food and a restroom.

With no luck for a while and only Carl’s Junior and KFC in sight, Daniel, who was the hungriest out of all of us, was not satisfied with any of the food choices, and was probably annoyed at Dillen and me for being indecisive. Out of the blue, he took control by saying “WE ARE GOING TO SEÑOR GRUBBY’S.” Now you may be thinking, “wtf is that?” And that was our exact response. The small, hole-in-the-wall Mexican food restaurant ended up having the most delicious burritos. Eddie ate his in approximately 0.002 seconds. Paxton and Jayson made the mistake of getting some overly priced ramen instead.

The next stop was the race site, where Coach AB magically appeared next to the car, waiting for us (in his Croc slides of course) next to the transition area. We did a practice bike loop around Fiesta Island so that we could get to know the course, and I was already feeling the excitement for the race to come. Dillen and I scoped out a group of girls practicing their transitions, and we knew we were going to dominate the competition for the Draft Legal race. Unbeknownst to us, they were not college athletes, but instead kids in junior high practicing for fun.

Next on the agenda was to find a place to park near the UCSD campus, so that we could pick up our race packets and go to the Draft Legal meeting. We entered a parking lot that had a big height clearance sign hanging from a metal pole. Although we didn’t know the height of the trailer, Eddie said, “it’ll be fineee…” Daniel stood outside the car and said in his quiet and calm voice, “we’re gonna hit it…we’re gonna hit it…yep, we hit it.”

After we “cleared” the sign, we had to go under a clearance bar that didn’t need to be there. Unlike the sign, there was no way this bar was going to budge. This is when we realized the severity of the situation we just put ourselves in. We were stuck between the bar that we couldn’t fit under, two islands blocking a left or right turn, and at least ten cars separating us and the sign we hit earlier. Daniel, who was still outside, was directing the cars behind to go around us while we thought of our next move.

We were all stressed out of our minds while our fearless leader, Eddie, remained completely composed. Once there was a clearing, we did the only thing we could do, which was to backup with the trailer still attached to the car. We ended up turning into another section of the parking lot which had ZERO exits that didn’t have a clearance barrier besides the one we just went through. We tried seeing if we could fit underneath any of the signs/bars, but couldn’t—we were stuck. Here’s where the teamwork came in. While Paxton and I stayed in the back of the car laughing about the situation, Jayson and Daniel ran around the parking lot to check if there were any exits without a clearance sign. Our only solution was to back up into incoming traffic, underneath the sign we hit on the way in. But first, we had to turn the trailer around. With Daniel and Jayson standing in the middle of the road, they directed Eddie to “safely” make a U-turn. It is safe to say that neither of them should be hired for giving directions. Jayson was using zero hand signals with his arms crossed, and Daniel was mumbling the directions so quietly that Eddie couldn’t even hear them. People in cars were filming and laughing as we backed up down the entrance. Jayson bit his nails in anxiousness as we hit the sign again, this time so hard that it almost fell off.

Eddie quickly parked the trailer in a more accessible location on the street, and we began the trek to the packet pickup area.

We walked for a long time, across fields, over rivers, through valleys, and up a giant hill to finally make it to the location. Along the way, Paxton was going crazy, took off his shoes and started jumping around like a goblin. At the pick-up, the race coordinators gave us the option to pick either a Tritonman hat, pair of socks, or arm sleeves, but Paxton didn’t get the memo. He stole all three pieces of merch and somehow ignored all the strange looks he was getting. After, we went to the Draft Legal meeting. It was quick, but despite that, Eddie and I felt like we were going to fall asleep as the Triathlon official droned on and on. We made the journey back to the car, and according to Daniel’s watch, we walked over 7 miles.

Finally, and illegally, we made it back onto the road, grabbed some dinner, and arrived at Katie’s house, her parents generously hosting part of the team for the weekend. We went to bed shortly after.  

DAY 1: Draft Legal

4:30 AM

The Draft-Legal squad woke up bright and early. It was a restless night of sleep, but we were alert and ready to go. The butterflies in my stomach seemed to be on crack because I was so excited, I could barely eat. I chowed down a bagel and a banana to get myself fueled up. It was still pitch black when our car rolled into the race site. We arrived at the course at about 5:15, the sound of “Love Tonight” blaring so that the other teams would know our presence. We headed over to transition and set up our gear.

This would be my first draft legal race. With swimming as my strongest leg of the race, I knew I had to push myself hard, so that by the time I got to the bike, I was far enough ahead to not get lapped out. On top of that, I was trying to remember the rules that were mentioned during the meeting the day before. Coach Sean reassured me that I was racking by bike correctly and that I knew everything necessary to not get a penalty. I felt some comfort as my race number was 202, landing me the prime spot of being the very last space on the girls’ transition rack, so I didn’t have to deal with losing my bike during the race.

6:50 AM

The boys started warming up for their race by getting used to the water temperature in the bay. Us girls were fortunate to start over an hour later, and Dillen and I watched from the shore as the triathletes lined up for their in-water start. Dillen and I started an Instagram Live to have some fun before we were going to be in a lot of pain during the race. The gun went off, and the boys race began. The 750-meter swim went by fast, and we were shocked to see that an Olympic Trials swimming qualifier was over 10 body lengths ahead of the second-place swimmer after only a few minutes. One by one, the racers finished the swim. According to Jayson, he was, “at the front of the pack until I drowned! They unzipped my wetsuit AND my race kit underneath!” Apparently, he “was in fourth place” until someone “almost killed him.”

After seeing the boys have strong finishes, my game face was on. I did some warm-up stretches before heading to the shore.

8:30AM

A shotgun blast signified the start of the girls’ race. I was in the front of the lineup, but still had to push and shove my way through some competitors that were in my way. The swim was fast, and all I remember was elbowing a girl in the stomach because she was touching my feet and then she yelped in surprise/pain (whoops ). My adrenaline was through the roof as we swam in the 58-degree water, and I got into a rhythm with my stroke. The run from the water to transition seemed like forever. I made my way to my bike, clipping on my helmet and made sure that I put everything in my designated bucket so I didn’t get a penalty.

Next came the bike. I quickly realized that racing Draft-Legal was a lot different than drafting during training. A large pack of athletes came hauling towards me whom I had beaten in the swim. At only halfway through lap 1 of 3, I got left in the dust by about 8 girls who dropped me off the pack. The rest of the bike consisted of me and 3 other girls in a pace line. It was brutal when the wind picked up. Paxton had told me how mentally taxing drafting is, and I didn’t understand what he meant until I was in the thick of it.

Soon enough the bike was over, and I transitioned to the run. It quickly got very hot during the race. The boys were fortunate to have had the chill of the early morning, but it got to 80-something degrees by the time I got to the running leg of the race. I had gone all out on the bike and was really paying the price on the run. With help from Daniel, Eddie and Paxton cheering from the sidelines, I kicked into a fifth gear and finished the race strong. Jayson ran alongside me for a bit of the last lap, yelling at me to go faster until he almost hit a pole while filming me on his GoPro.

I finished the race gasping for air, overwhelmed with it being over. Eddie told me to sit down, but I knew if I did, I would never be able to stand back up. Soon after me came Dillen hauling across the finish line. Race 1 was a success, but I felt even more prepared for the Collegiate race the next day as I was familiar with the course and knew there were technical things that I could do better.

12:00 PM

After recovering from our efforts during the race, we went to back to Katie’s house to debrief the race before getting a post-race meal. Eddie and Jayson were showing off their rubix cube solving skills, and I felt like I was in a coma because I was so tired. We drove to a little diner, and the wait was “30 minutes” which turned into 2 hours because of a group of grandparents taking their sweet time eating pancakes. During the wait, Jayson got Coach Sean hooked on Pokémon Go, and Eddie and I saw a guy decked out in USA merch. He looked like a stellar athlete, and we decided that he was probably a track athlete. We googled 2022 Olympians, and low and behold, the guy we saw happened to be a 5x Olympian in the long-distance races.

When the food came, everyone sat in silence for a long time while we ate. It could have been my hunger, but it was the best burger I’ve had in a while. Coach Sean had a giant milkshake and exclaimed, “I need to fatten up!”

8:30 PM

After returning to the house, all of us draft-legal peeps were laying on the couches recovering from that morning. Like the wonderful scholar I am, I finished up my math homework while I used Katie’s dad’s fancy compression-marathon-recovery device on my legs. Jayson was sitting upright petting one of Katie’s many cats, and I joined him after a while to give the cat some love. Suddenly, I was mauled!!! The cat scratched my face deeply, and I was bleeding out. I didn’t think I was going to make it, and told Jayson that it’s all his fault, and to “tell my parents I love them.”

The team was finally back together when the second van arrived. Pasta, pizza, salad, and garlic bread were generously prepared, and we had a superb homemade meal. During dinner, we looked at all the race pictures from that morning and laughed about our absurd facial expressions. Someone took a picture of me from the run that should never have seen the light of day, put my phone number on it, and captioned it “Looking for a Valentine.” Everyone joked about printing out the picture, making t-shirts, and finding me a Valentine at the race the next day. This started the meme battle of the century, and I have to say, I was most definitely the best at coming up with captions that absolutely ROASTED everyone. The racers quickly fell asleep shortly after, packed like sardines on Katie’s living room floor while Dillen and I slept in beds.

Day 2- CLASSIC

4:00 AM

It was day three of the Tritonman weekend, and those of us who raced Draft Legal the day before were a little tired, a little sore, but hyped up for another chance to race. The UCSB triathletes found themselves well rested after an early bedtime the night before, and they trailed after the scents of cappuccinos and bagels to the kitchen for the hearty breakfast.

On the way to the race site, Jayson and I sat in the back of the van firing each other up for a great race, meanwhile Daniel sat quietly as….yep you guessed it…“Love Tonight” played another million times (via Jayson and Eddie’s expertly curated playlist that they made the night before).  

Upon arrival, we continued playing the most basic house party songs known to man while we re-assembled our bikes. It was soon announced that the water temperature was even colder than the day before, meaning that wetsuits would be mandatory for everyone. I saw Ryan in the transiton area with a look of panic on his face, and the team group chat started popping off in hysteria. Out of nowhere, a bin of team wetsuits appeared, and all was well again. Except for Taryn’s wetsuit, which was so old and beat up that she had to tie it together with a string for it to stay together. 

This race had 2 heats of boys and 2 heats of girls. After both heats of boys were set off, I started the OLÉ gauchos cheer and it was time to race. While waiting, we watched the first wave of boys exiting the water. Jayson redeemed his horrendous performance the night before by being third out of the water! Even though I raced the day before, I felt way faster. On the swim, there were 2 girls drafting on me for a while. They turned out to be Gabby and Megan and neither of them knew it was me.

On the bike, I tried to keep my pretty decent start from the swim. Coach AB and Sean cheered from the sidelines and watched everyone start their laps. Somewhere along the way, Logan whizzed past me on his TT bike, and I said something to him like “good job,” but he didn’t hear. Paxton and Daniel came up behind me too and said some motivational words. On the final lap of the bike, I caught up to Taylor and we rode the whole last lap together. There really is nothing quite like seeing all your best friends racing their hearts out on the same course.

I felt so fresh off the bike, went as hard as I could on the run. I ended up beating some of the girls who had beat me the day before in the Draft-Legal race, and I showed them who really was boss .

If there was a spirit award, we would have won. Our new tropical-printed kits looked so good compared to the boring yellow and blue of the other schools, and we cheered loudly as our teammates ran through the finish line.

After everyone was finished, Jayson set off to find me a Valentine. He was set on a dude named Drew from the CU Boulder team, but he disappeared before I could pop the question.

11:00 AM

WOOHOO! Both races were over! I was sitting shot-gun next to Eddie and was on aux, sparing the other passengers from listening to my dreaded country music. Eddie told me I had to stay awake which was very difficult for me, so I kept myself entertained by making fun of Jayson and feeding Eddie Hawaiian rolls and Redbull.

Nathan and Megan had joined us on the car ride back, and Nathan insisted that we stop at Burger King because they, “sell 8 chicken nuggets for only 1 dollar! 1 DOLLAR!” Me with my expert navigational skills found the closest possible Burger King off the freeway and took us to the classic fast-food restaurant, which I had never been to before.

Eddie pulled into the lot with the trailer, parking across 6 parking spots. I have to say, for my first time at Burger King, it was pretty mediocre, but anything was better than DLG. I had my double-whopper and shortly after, my fight-or-flight kicked in because I almost got locked in the bathroom. To prevent getting stuck in another parking lot, I took charge and did a way better job at spotting Eddie than Daniel and Jayson (I actually used hand signals unlike certain individuals). Then we set off again.

So, in conclusion, I’d say that this weekend was a success. I know that “Swimmer’s-high” and “Runner’s-high” is a pretty cool phenomenon, but trust me, “Tri-high” is 1000000x better. I’m so proud of how everyone did, and stoked for the next races to come. And no, in case you were wondering, I never got a Valentine.

IRONBRUIN 2021 BY LOGAN UNGER

This is Logan Unger and I am a first year.  This race was my first triathlon ever.  

On Saturday, the day before the race, we all gathered at the Recreation Center parking lot with our bikes and bags.  We had a pretty uneventful loading of the trailers and vehicles.  The drive was about two hours, which felt pretty reasonable.  I was excited to be in the car with all my best friends and nervous for the race the next day, which made me chatty.  My filter was turned off and I pretty much said whatever thought came to my head.  I made people laugh about 30% of the time with my dad-joke-esque puns and bizarre rants.  Everyone in the van was joking about how much they hated me.  Well, they told me they were joking.  All the vehicles stopped to get food at this little strip mall before we broke off to the various houses in which we were staying.  I was staying at Teresa’s house and it was amazing.  Teresa’s mom provided a few air mattresses and even some food in the morning.  I went to bed at about 9:00 knowing that my alarm was set for 4:15 the next morning.  

I woke up at 4:00 and I was completely juiced with adrenaline.  I lay in the air mattress just staring at the ceiling with wide-open eyes and no hope of getting those last 15 minutes of sleep.  We had another blissfully uneventful trip to the race site.  

The site was nothing if not chaotic.  There were over 1300 athletes racing in 15 events.  Nobody really had a full understanding of what was going on.  We managed to get all the vans with people into a parking lot close to the transition, but the trailers with the bikes were forced to go in a parking lot about half a mile away.  My background is cross country and track, where the meets are extremely organized and the runners can focus solely on preparing for their race.  This was the complete opposite.  Announcements for the races blared over the public announcement system.  People asked each other questions every 30 seconds.  We had to find the bike trailers and unload them as quickly as possible.  All the while, the time until the race was set to begin was getting shorter and shorter.  Thankfully, Coach AB collected all of our race packets for us, so that part was centralized.  

After everyone prepared their transitions, we walked toward the race start.  I had never put on a wetsuit and my nerves made it difficult to do it properly.  When I finally got it on, I marveled at the ingenuity of putting the zipper in the front before realizing that I had put my wetsuit on backward.  Thank goodness that Rohan was there to calm me down and help me put it on the correct way.  I walked into the water, fully expecting myself to seize up from the coldness of the harbor water.  I was wrong.  Wetsuits work.  I felt comfortable, bordering on warm, in the water.  The race start was delayed for 20 minutes, which really iced us.  My race anxiety started to settle down at this point.  Matt Scurria was shivering quite a bit.  He looked like he had taken a dip in a frigid ocean wearing a thin layer of polyester and spandex and was being forced to stand in cold, windy weather, which made sense since that was exactly what happened to him.  I was iced in the sense that I started doubting my abilities in this endless 20 minutes.  I got some energy and confidence back with the team chant.  UCSB was by far the biggest college team at the race, so we looked imposing and inspiring during this chant.  

In a continuation of the organization of the race, I didn’t hear the race director start our race.  Luckily, it wasn’t that important for me to be near the front since I was expecting to be in the back of the pack in the water and the race would start when my chip crossed the starting line.  The swim felt like it was taking forever, even though it was only 400 meters.  My body felt exhausted and fully energized at the same time.  I didn’t feel like I could move any faster than I was going but I also didn’t feel like I was putting in much work.  The day before the race, Dixon and I had talked about how fast each of us wanted to go in the water.  I told him that I would be happy with 7:30 for 400 meters (laugh all you want, swimmers) since that is about 1:42 per 100 yards.  I was pleasantly shocked when I looked at my watch after the swim and I had hit 6:59.  My excitement was dampened when I realized that I didn’t know how to remove my wetsuit.  I knew that there should be a long zipper that I could pull to get it off, but I could only feel a really short zipper.  I was super embarrassed and I imagined myself racing the rest of the race in a wetsuit, completely boiling myself alive and being ridiculed by everyone in attendance.  This crisis was averted by asking Philippe to pull down on the zipper, who did so without hesitation.  I had a horrible transition because of this folly, my inability to find my bike, my inefficient manner of putting on my helmet and bike shoes, and the fact that my bike computer had turned itself off. 

Because of all this, I was unbelievably stoked to get on the bike and just pedal away from my problems.  The bike was so liberating.  I averaged 25 miles per hour for the first three miles and I felt incredible.  I flew by a few people and struggled past others.  When I passed Dori, I waved good-bye to her, which is a pretty arrogant move in hindsight.  About 3 miles into the bike, there was a punchy hill.  I thought about Primoz Roglic and his incredible ability to fly up hills like these but decided to save myself for the rest of the bike.  I was still winded and I knew that I wouldn’t gain much time by putting in a strong effort on that climb.  As I came down the hill, I saw the top athletes zooming past me on the other side of the road in the opposite direction.  In about fourth place was someone in a UCSB kit who was absolutely cooking it.  I thought it was a former UCSB triathlete wearing out kit who had gone pro because this dude had a beautiful black and white aero helmet, a sexy white TT bike, and a perfect aero tuck.  It took me until the beginning of the run to realize that this guy was Eddie.  He was definitely in his element.  A tiny bit farther down the hill, I saw a bullet go by on the race course.  Okay, I understand that this is a cliché, but there is no other way to describe Dixon Atkins when he is on his TT bike with a mission.  He was making the top triathletes in the race look like they were on cruisers going to class.  After that, I saw Henry, who was in a nice paceline, and- wait.  Paceline?  This is an INDIVIDUAL time trial!  I teased him about this after the race, and he claimed that it was fair for him to draft since he was on an aluminum bike.  Readers, make your own opinions about this controversial issue.  Anyway, this is where I entered the pain cave.  Every pedal stroke felt harder than the last one and my cadence was slowly dropping.  I pushed my body past what I thought was possible.  For the rest of the 8 mile bike, I was deep in the pain cave.  I naïvely thought that I would feel better when I started running, but this was definitely just wishful thinking.

When I got into T2, I was pretty wiped.  I followed Rohan, thinking he would be at the UCSB bike rack, but he was racing for Cal, so I went to the wrong rack.  Matt Scurria yelled to me that our rack was way back in the other direction, so I turned around to try and find it and went too far that way.  Needless to say, I was pretty flustered when I finally found my running shoes.  I took off for the run and that intense pain of being fully lactic consumed me.  It was brick time.  I moved my legs as fast as I felt possible, but it felt like I was a jockey and my body was a horse that wouldn’t listen to me.  The entire run was in the red and felt like it was in slow motion.  About one mile into the run, there was a steep hill.  I told myself to relax on the uphill, a tip from cross country in high school.  When I got to the top, I felt like I had recovered a bit.  I made the U-turn and sent it.  I passed about five people on this roughly 300 meter descent, bombing down the hill at 4:30 per mile pace.  One of those people was Emory, who looked very much like a shark out of water.  See, I could say that Emory was a fish out of water, but that wouldn’t do him justice.  When he’s in the water, he’s a shark: gigantic and powerful.  He placed third out of everyone in the swim, which is ridiculous.  However, on this downhill, he looked like he was trying not to fall, which is fair.  The rest of the run was a slog.  I was already so far back that there wasn’t anyone faster than me behind me, so I was able to spot people in the distance and track them down without being mentally devastated by someone blowing by me.  I basically held my position in the run, running a bit slower than I would have liked but still finishing strong.  I told Harry before the race that I wanted to finish on empty, and I can confidently say that I did that.  I almost collapsed at the line; it felt exactly like crossing the finish line at the end of a cross country race in high school.  

Everyone compared times after the race, which was fun.  People seemed, for the most part, happy with their races and excited to be competing either for the first time or again.  I did a little cool down jog with Matt Scurria and we then packed all of our stuff up and hit the road.  I packed my own lunch and our van stopped for burgers.  We talked a little bit and slept most of the way back.  I could definitely feel the 4 am wakeup time.  

Overall, it was a beautiful experience and I can’t wait to do it again!

UCLA Ironbruin 2019 by Paxton Rush

Hey everybody! I’m Paxton, a first year here on the tri team, and this is Ironbruin 2019! Woo!

So we all got to the parking lot by the rec cen somewhere around 4. Lots of people had rented sleeping bags and pads from the adventure club. I road in Dustin’s van with Colby, Vanessa, Zephyr, Phillipe, Michael, Ian, and Declan. We drove for around two hours through some thick traffic, listening to Zephyr’s jams and telling jokes, then we stopped to get dinner at an Italian place. We ended up going to baskin Robbins afterwards for some pre-race ice cream for another hour or so, then we pulled into Jared’s parents house, who were kind enough to host us for the night! Phillipe swore that the couch was too soft and slept on the floor; his loss!

Our group slept from 11-4:45ish, so a decent amount of sleep. We got up, had some bagels and grapes generously provided to us, and drove to the race site!

The race site was at Santa Fe Dam. Transition was in a parking lot right outside the lake. The swim was a weird triangle around lake, then you hiked up to the top of the damn and did two weird loops around it, and then you ran a lap around the lake.

We spent a while prepping in transition, with Dustin showing me and the other freshmen how to set everything up. We put on our wetsuits, took one last crap, warmed up for a bit, and we were off!

The swim was pretty good, everyone felt fast. We were greeted by cheers from Coach, Zephyr, Rick, and Sean at transition. The bike course ended up being very flat and very fast. The run felt awful, but it was actually a good course. Just need to do more bricks.

I ended up finishing in 13th place; 4h in the team and the fastest freshmen. Dustin podiumed and got third with the fastest run, and Jared got 6th with the fastest bike and the second fastest run. Michael ended at 10th, and was a little too far away for me to catch. Sarah ended up winning the whole thing! Iris also got podium with a third. Declan ended up crashing on the second loop; his tire went out from under him and he fell on the turnaround. He scraped up his chin and his elbow, but he still finished! Everyone did such a good job on the race. We stopped at luscious dumplings on the way back for some quality refueling, and then we went home to nap :)

ZOT TROT 2019 BY KELLYCLAIRE ROBERTSON

The Gauchos’ first race of Triathlon season was both a success and a blast! The team left for Irvine on Saturday, 2/9, taking two vans and enjoyed a smooth ride down from Santa Barbara. As alarms went off at 4:30am the next morning, the gauchos sprung out of from their sleeping bags filled with excitement and nervousness ready to take on the first race. Upon arrival at the transition area, the news quickly spread that bike section was cancelled due to the rain that morning. The athletes experienced mixed emotions as they then keenly prepared for the run-swim-run.

At the starting line, all the jitteriness and nerves were encountered with a beautiful Southern California sunrise and our “olé, olé” cheer that rang through the Irvine suburbs. When the horn went off, the men, shortly followed by the women, dashed around the field beginning the 6k run. Athletes sped through transition until jumping feet-first into the pool where they zig-zagged, flip-turned, and splashed their way through a transient two-hundred-fifty yards. Emerging out of the water and tearing their way back the transition, they raced the final stretch as a 2k until flouncing their feet through the finish line.

Our very own Iris Wu took second place on the women’s side followed by Bella Ward placing seventh, and there were many strong performances from first time Zot-Trotters Bella Siering, Emily Wapman, Addie Seale, and Angela Huang. On the men's side, Ricardo Cortes took eighth place followed by Eddie Schultz, and Jacob Ogawa, and Jared Kliszewski taking 10th, 11th, and 12th place, respectively.

Overall, this race was a great way to kick off the season! Special thanks to Dane’s family for allowing us to squeeze into their lovely home in Irvine and making it possible for so many athletes to compete. Also thank you to Coach Matt, Sean, and former president Gordon for making the drive down to support all of us.

KellyClaire Robertson, Team Member.

COLLEGIATE NATS BY SIERRA MORENO

I am very fortunate to be able to write the very first and very last blog post of the year and I promise I am going to do my best to make it as good as Jared’s. In case you have been living under a rock, UCSB Triathlon attended the USA Triathlon Collegiate Club National Championships this past weekend in Tuscaloosa, AL and I am here to tell you ALL about it…way more details than any of our Instagram and Facebook posts combined so stay tuned.

Tuesday April  24, 2018 The day that changed everything

Today was the day that USAT decided that no matter how much stress every team was already under, they wanted to send every team in the country into hysterics. I believe the email subject read something like “Important Race Update”. So ambiguous, yet so unalarmingly normal that anyone would have assumed that they were sending out the schedule for the weekend. So, Nick opened the email, “Unfortunately, USA Triathlon has been forced to shift all courses from a triathlon to a duathlon (run-bike-run) to ensure athlete safety”. *chaos ensues* Sarah proclaimed the first run would be a 5k meaning that in total we would have to run 15k aka 9ish miles. Many expletives were proclaimed by Sierra while Iris had a spiritual experience, realizing that there was in fact a god, and Coach Matt left his phone for an hour and came back to 57 urgent text messages from his athletes. After everyone had regained the ability to think properly, we realized that no one was running 9 miles with a bike in-between but instead the first run would be a 5k, followed by a 40k bike, and then another 5k run. The runners were happy, the swimmers were still salty but moderately glad they didn't have to run 6 miles all at once, and well, I don’t really think any cyclists were affected. 

Wednesday April 25, 2018 Travel Day

It was time to leave for LAX for a long day of travel! It’s important to note that even though Matt and John got lost once again in IV, we still left on time. I repeat, WE LEFT ON TIME!!!! So we made the drive down to LA while listening to Matt’s terror of flying build higher and higher with every mile we got closer to the airport. Upon arrival, we realized that his jokes about hoping he would end up on a no fly list were not jokes. Despite his caring presidents attempt to hold his shaking hands, he still ended up in the Dunkin' Donuts in an attempt to calm his nerves. After a long flight we finally landed in Atlanta, Georgia at around midnight local time. After a rental car fiasco, we then waited for the hotel shuttle where we could fit all but 4 of us if you don’t include Emme smashing herself in between 2 seats so the driver wouldn't see her. A small group had a final hurrah for the day at Waffle House or as Ricky called it, “Awful House”.

Thursday April 26, 2018 Sport Mode and Superstore

In celebration of finally getting the rental car situation figured out, Coach Matt practically leapt into the car in conquest of the nearest Bojangles. For those of you that don’t know, Bojangles is a chicken and biscuit fast food restaurant exclusively in the south and also a sanctuary for lost souls, lovers of fried chicken, biscuits of all kinds and sweet tea. I highly recommend making a trip to Alabama simply for Bojangles. Here’s a link to their website should you want to learn more: https://www.bojangles.com. Ricky almost threw up all the way to Alabama because Gordon got too caught up in putting the car in “sport mode” which proved to be too fast for the nice Southern drivers going at or below the speed limit, while Sarah complained about having to sit in the middle because her “hips are too big”. This eventually sparked a sing-along to Shakira’s smash hit “Hips Don’t Lie” which, for the record, Gordon knows every single line to. Coach Matt happily sung along to every country song ever made and Sierra third wheeled the entire time in the backseat but was just happy to have sweet tea that Gordon almost made her spill on multiple accounts because of said sport mode.

About 3 hours later we made it to our final destination of Tuscaloosa, AL!!! We picked up our bikes from the awesome dudes at TriBike transport, went on a little shakeout ride and run and then starting heading back to the hotel with a quick stop at Walmart. The lesson we learned today is not to leave a bunch of hungry, tired triathletes in a Walmart superstore or else they will come out with an abundance of unnecessary items like fishing rods and bait, whole melons, and excessive quantities of milk.

Friday April 27, 2018 Draft Legal Day

Everyone was so excited for this day as draft legal races are one of the funnest events and most of the team gets the thrill and excitement of racing without actually having to race, it’s great. It is also the day that the spirit award is won, so we loaded the cars dressed in our skittles outfits ready to cheer on our 2 favorite draft legal athletes in a rainbow of different colors. Despite coming off of her stellar performance at the Boston Marathon just 2 weeks ago, Iris Wu rose to the occasion when asked if she would do the draft legal race once it got changed to run-bike-run. And boy did she deliver! Knowing that her body was already tired, her teammates weren’t expecting her to do anything but her best, but it turns out her best is actually one of the best in the country. With the first pack being only 4 of the most elite girls, we were super happy when she ran well enough to get her a spot in the second pack, the first really big pack. The first few laps went by and Iris slowly made her way from the back into the middle, but as the pack came into the dismount line on the last lap, who was leading the pack? That’s right, our very own Iris Wu was fifth into transition, leading the second pack. She followed that with a great run time that earned her a spot in the top 25 in a race that, up until 2 days prior, she didn’t think she would be doing. Iris is our queen!!!!

Sean raced next in a race that we knew was going to be INSANE. These were going to be the top triathletes in the country going balls to the wall for the first mile and a half to earn their spot into the best draft pack. The first and last run were only 1.5 miles, leaving no time for pacing or strategy, just sprint. These were anything but ideal conditions for Sean who has been working his swim harder than anyone for this moment; however, he still managed to get into the first draft pack and like Iris, made his way to the front of it by the end. Unfortunately, he did not retain his lead in that last short sprint to the finish and while we were all super proud of and blown away by his performance, the face of disappointment he wore said that he felt otherwise. But honestly, that is what made what happened the next day that much better.

Saturday April 28, 2018 Classic day and the best day ever

The day began with the ladies. Sarah, Iris and Emme all started in Wave 1 and went off with a bang. Emme ran way faster than she probably should have on her injured leg, Sarah gave it all she had even though she was still upset that she wasn’t swimming and Iris did what she does best, run fast. Bella and Nicole showed us how lucky we are to have such promising freshman as they confidently lined up at the start line as cool as cucumbers. Kelly and Jordan started in wave 3 followed by Sierra in wave 4. Of course Iris ran fast, but she also had an insanely fast bike split that put her in the top 50. Sarah hauled on her bike and despite not having swam, had a very impressive race. Emme, oh Emme, what can I say? The day before she didn’t even know if she was going to race and then here she comes with a mega fast run and bike split. She may have hobbled in to the finish line but she made our team proud with her tenacity and will to compete for UCSB despite doctors orders. Bella had an amazing race, running and biking her way into the 4th and last scoring spot for the girls. Nicole had a really speedy bike and pushed her run while Jordan had an ultra fast run! Kelly persevered through some bike troubles and still managed to have a great race! Sierra came off the bike with a PR and proceeded to bond with a girl from Cal who listened to her woes about not being able to swim only to discover, that they were both indeed fish out of water just trying to make it to the finish line. Wow, finishing 12th out of a whopping 92 teams means it was a great day to be a Gaucho girl!! We’re so proud of all of your performances!! 

The para-race didn’t start too long after the girls. Ryan lined up at the start line and, as soon as the gun went off, took off pretty close to the speed of light. He was quickly faced with a steep downhill as a challenge but fearlessly took the plunge and successfully made it. With that out of the way, he was faced again with some difficult terrain that he managed to navigate through. He pushed through the bike and finished the race with a beat up hand as his racing gloves fell off but refused to let that stop him from pulling off a truly noteworthy performance. Such an inspiring guy, such an inspiring race!! (That’s one 1st place.) 

The guys race started about an hour after with Sean, Ricky and Gordon in the first wave. Sean and Ricky took off with speed while Gordon hung around with some swimmers mid pack, again bonding about how they would be so much better if they could just get in the dang water. It was a truly amazing feat, as it always is, to see Gordon absolutely smash on the bike but what was even better was to see him smiling out of transition and looking great going into that last run. A stark contrast from last years egg-laying incident, he managed to get a bike split so fast that the officials disqualified him because they simply did not believe that any one man could ride a bicycle that fast. When approached about it and asked if he could really ride that fast, he said with the biggest Gordo grin, “Yeah!!” So, he got the fastest bike split of the day, the fastest bike split in the history of the course and also finessed his way into the top 40. Oh and also, his slowest lap was still faster than anyone else on the course. Wowzers!! (That’s another top of the podium, because, yes, now we’re counting.)

Ricardo made us just as proud with his stellar performance and competitiveness out on the course. It has been amazing to watch you work so hard and to see it all pay off, even if you don’t think it has. Nick was next out of the gate and as much as he says he’s just a swimmer or a frat boy, he’s also an all around beast of a triathlete. Great runs, great bike, and definitely wins the award for making all the girls on other teams giggle and swoon as he flexed for his lone UCSB cheerleader going into transition. Jacob started the race with a CRAZY fast run causing everyone that watched him to envy his gazelle like run form as he floated through the air with ease. Blake showed us that he indeed DOES have as much athletic prowess as he said he did the day before. He may have raced so hard he needed some special care after but ya know what? That’s what triathletes at collegiate nationals do. Rick and Ray pulled off perhaps one of the cutest stunts the sport of triathlon has ever witnessed as they ran the first run together, biked together, and pretty much ran the whole second run together until Rick pulled slightly ahead at the very end. Those 2 are so sneaky fast!!! And speaking of sneaky fast, let’s talk about John Frey. He averaged sub 6 on the first run, a strong 23 mph on the bike and then another 6 average on the second run!! Only one minute behind Ricky, he snagged that last scoring spot for our boys. And since we’re talking about scoring… our boys finished 6th in the country. 6th!!! Out of 102 teams!!! Holy cow I love ya’ll!!!!

Alright, I know you’re reading this for THE story so here it is.

The gun went off and Sean took off from the chute with the leading pack. He wasn’t first going into T1 but was not far behind. Things drastically changed in the next 24.8 miles on the bike, when he lead the way into T2. He shot out of T2 like a bullet with the next few guys hot on his heels.  

Coach Matt came rushing back to the tent in a frenzy, “This race has already taken a year off of my life!!” he said as he explained to us that Sean was only seconds ahead of the guy that had outran him the day before. The announcer informed the crowd that Sean was the first one to hit the turn around on the second run, he was ahead with only 1.6 miles left in his collegiate triathlon career. Of course this is the time when the announcer decides to stop with all further updates about the situation and everything goes silent. 

2 minutes goes by and the girls in the tent were anxious to see their teammate round the corner or at the very least, get an update about his whereabouts. 

4 minutes: The only thing that could be heard is Nicole and Sierra’s hearts pounding and Iris whispering to herself “come on Sean, come on Sean!”

5 minutes: Sierra squeezes the life out of Iris’ hand as there is still no update. The girls talk about how badly they want this for him! This is the guy that deserves it the most, this is the guy that has worked for years for this one goal that he has his last shot at. 

6 minutes: “One of my coaches one time said that the first mile is won by the fastest guy, the second is won by the one who practiced the most and the third is won by the guy with the most heart.” -Iris 

Well, good thing Big Sean is all of those guys.

8 minutes: …

The moment we saw that flash of neon with UCSB along the leg round the corner was one we will never forget. It was like the world was moving in slow motion when in fact, this man was running VERY fast. One loud SEANNNNN was exclaimed by every girl in the tent right before they used every ounce of energy they had left to push through the innocent spectators and sprint to meet their teammate at the finish line. One very confused man questioned the world, “What’s happening? Why are they running, did he just win??” Heck yeah he just won. He just won our first olympic distance natty in 25 years. Coach Matt burst into tears and it was truly the most emotional moment any of us had ever witnessed. Our very own Big Seany Harry just made history. (and that’s 3)

Saturday April 28, 2018 Mixed Team Relay

4 hours after the excitement, UCSB Triathlon competed in it’s first ever mixed team relay, an event that literally everyone was dreading to do because they had just finished a whole race hours before. But, we were super happy with the results and it was actually such a fun event! The race started with Sarah, who despite being more tired than she has ever been, pushed herself to her max for her team. She passed the baton off to Gordon who had strong runs and caught up a ton on the bike. Iris was next and looked the least happy any of us had ever seen her. If you know Iris you know she’s a bundle of joy and when she looks the way she did in this relay, she must really be hating life. Sorry Iris!!! Our anchor was no other than John Frey. After the weekend he had had, Sean just knew that MTR was not going to be a good idea and John enthusiastically stepped up to the plate and helped us realize that putting him in was a great idea. You guys did great and lit a fire for the rest of us to help us see how cool MTR is!!!

Saturday April 28, 2018 Let’s party!!!

Prior to awards we had one last team dinner, this time Bojangles and literal gallons of sweet tea. All 20 of us crammed into a single hotel room, shared greasy chicken and there was not a frown in sight. We then made our way to awards where Blake and Emme’s car had a deep and meaningful conversation about how small words often mean the biggest things, like “God” and “yet”. Coach Matt decided to chime in with some personal experience and say how “but” is also a big one, like “I love you, but…” He instantly regretted joining into the conversation when it was followed by badgering to get Matt to tell the story about his first heartbreak but apparently that is a story that will have to wait for next Nationals. 

We walked into awards with heads held high and more tri luv for each other than I have ever seen before. Ryan was called onto stage first to win his first place prize and I am SURE that the rest of the schools said something related to our party school reputation based on how loud we were but we didn’t care in the slightest. It was then time for non-draft awards. The anticipation as they crept up from 10th, then 6th, then 3rd was nearly unbearable because we just really couldn’t wait to lose it. They called UCSB’s Sean Harrington for first place and it was MADNESS. Snapchat videos were in full swing, voices were lost, and thanks to our so-called rivals, Cal Poly SLO, tortillas went flying, proving that rivalries don’t exist in triathlon. Tortillas continued to fly when Gordon accepted his super cool helmet for winning the bike split, making it 3 times the Gauchos was called to the TOP of the podium that night.  

We dragged out the night by taking tons of pictures to memorialize every moment. As the room became scarce, we put our arms around each other for the last time and chanted the greatest and most glorious of Olé’s. So great that we made our way onto the official USAT Instagram story. We went back to the hotel and got ready for our long drive back to Atlanta to catch our early morning flight but not before Nick got a guy on the Texas team to chug a full half gallon of milk. Yes, a full half gallon. As if those there didn’t already know, UCSB had officially left its mark on Tuscaloosa. 

Thank you.

I want to end by saying we did not do this on our own. There are countless thank you’s that need to go out but I know you’re getting tired of reading. Huge thank you to our travel coordinator, Ricardo Cortes, for making this whole trip possible. It is a FACT that without you, we just simply wouldn’t have made it. Thank you to John, Sean, Gordon, and Ricky again for safely driving us all around during this trip. All four of you easily could have valued your race performance more than driving us around, but you didn’t and even if we don’t say it, we are beyond grateful. Thank you Ms. Harrington and Roscoe for your constant support throughout the whole trip. Roscoe provided some much needed pet therapy and it was so nice of you to make the journey out to support Sean and the rest of the team as well. Thank you to Iris and John for stepping up when the team needed you the most. Thank you to all the nats first timers for the hype and energy you had seeing all of this for the first time, it really made the returners remember why they are there. Thank you to all the returners for helping out the rookies and being stand up people that we can all lean on. Thanks Gordon for becoming a great leader and caring so much about your team. Thank you to Ryan, Sean, and Emme who will not be racing with us next year as they will be graduating and moving on to bigger and better things. You have each inspired us in different ways and I truly can’t wait to see where life takes you guys. Thanks to all of our sponsors, especially Specialized and Velo Pro for making sure our bikes were in top condition, Pearl Izumi for making us kits that the rest of the schools envied, and Patagonia for keeping us warm race morning! Thank you to all of the parents of our athletes who have offered unwavering support and who have raised some of the finest young men and women this world has to offer.  Most of all, thank you Coach. Words cannot explain how fortunate and blessed we are to have you. It is clear that you pour your heart and soul into this sport, this team, and into us. All of us have had coaches that only care about winning but what is so special about you is that you care so much for the betterment of the team while caring about each of us individually. You are the reason that UCSB Tri is so special. You’ve created an environment where people want to have fun and make lifelong friends while improving themselves and each other along the way. In my opinion, this is a winning recipe and we’re so grateful for that.  

If you’ve never been on a team like this, there is just no way you can understand why this is so special and there is just simply no way that I can describe it to you. If you’re on the team and didn’t go to nats this year, I hope that this post has inspired you to put in the work so you can go next year and all the times after that. These are the moments that make UCSB Triathlon so extraordinary. These are the times that don’t just make us friends and teammates, but family. It wasn’t just because of the 2 national championships we brought home, nor was it the 3 friends we got to scream for at the top of the podium; it wasn’t even about the top 10 finish. It was about the smiles from the abundance of PR’s, the tears and bear hugs at the finish line and the sleep deprived laughs and conversations that made it all worth it. Congratulations UCSB triathlon, we freaking did it, and the way our team is looking, we can only go up from here. I said at the end of the very first blog post that this was our year, and well, looks like I was right.